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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28322898">slowly falling</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/silly_g00se/pseuds/silly_g00se'>silly_g00se</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>naegami highschool au [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Normal High School, Canon Divergence, First Kiss, M/M, Naegami, No Spoilers, Non-Graphic Violence, Parental Abuse, Unhealthy Family Relationship, abuse but it's not graphic, bc i cant write makoto very well, byakuya denies his feelings, byakuya's pov, celestia is just there, makoto is out here vibing, makoto is probably ooc, my first danganronpa fic, slowburn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 17:09:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,467</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28322898</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/silly_g00se/pseuds/silly_g00se</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Byakuya Togami wants the one thing he can't have.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Celestia Ludenberg &amp; Togami Byakuya, Kirigiri Kyoko/Celestia Ludenberg (Background), Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>naegami highschool au [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2112147</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>149</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>slowly falling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>first dangan fic!! and it's my comfort ship &lt;3<br/>a few things!<br/>1. read the tags please!! don't trigger yourselves<br/>2. this is probably super ooc- i don't have a good grasp on makoto's personality yet haha<br/>3. i may make this a series? probably not,,<br/>4. kudos and comment!! it means the world to me!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Byakuya Togami was a perfect child. He never talked back, never disobeyed the rules, and not only succeeded but excelled in everything he did. From a young age it was clear he was destined for the Togami throne, and once he was chosen, he had a whole future laid out for him. He was to be just like his father, his grandfather, his great grandfather, so on and so forth. Carrying on a legacy like that came with oddly strict rules. Byakuya had never really dared to break the rules. He wasn’t a rebellious child, no, he was the perfect little progeny for his father. And, besides, if he broke the rules, the punishments were… extreme.</p><p>It wasn’t unusual for Byakuya to visit his home’s infirmary- quite the opposite. It was odd if he <i> didn’t </i> visit it at least once a week. Usually if that happened he’d been well-behaved enough, at least that’s what his father said. He didn’t break rules.</p><p>But he did make mistakes.</p><p>Any tiny little thing he did could be deemed as a mistake by his father. If he spoke one word wrong, made one wrong move, he knew the consequences: beating. Usually he’d just be backhanded if his father was feeling merciful enough. However, if he had time, his father would milk the punishments for all they were worth until Byakuya was nothing but a broken, bruised, and quivering boy on the floor.</p><p>‘It strengthens him,’ His father would say. ‘I’m doing him a favor.’</p><p>Byakuya hated to think he was right.</p><p>Thanks to those harsh punishments, his demeanor became cold and hard. His words were as sharp as a knife, stabbing into whatever and whoever he saw fit. So, Byakuya’s words became his shield, and since then he was an impenetrable castle. His heart lay at the core of the castle, boarded up by iron chains and wooden doors. He refused to let anyone in, and be seen in a vulnerable state.</p><p>After making that decision years ago, he’d come to know a fairly stale life. He had one person whom he considered a friend- Celestia Ludenberg- but other than that, he didn’t talk to anyone. He spoke to his classmates every now and again but he didn’t have a relationship with any of them.</p><p>He’d brought this up to Celestia once while they were hanging out. They were outside, laying on Byakuya’s roof as they stared up at the stars. The stars were safe, to Byakuya. He could stare up at them for hours, could spill all the feelings he had to them and not have fear of penalty. </p><p>“Celeste,” Byakuya spoke quietly, breaking the silence for a few moments.</p><p>“Yes?” </p><p>“Do you ever wish that people didn’t just fear you? Or avoid you because of your status?”</p><p>That caused Celestia to sit up, looking over at Byakuya. The suddenness of the question must have meant it was on his mind for a while, right? Or perhaps it was just Byakuya being himself.</p><p>“Well… I suppose no. My title has earned me lots of respect and wealth- there is nothing to complain about in my case. However, why do you ask?”</p><p>Byakuya offered a hum in response. “No reason. I was just curious.”</p><p>“If you say so.”</p><p>That was well over a year ago. He hadn’t brought it up since then.</p><p>It was that very discussion that led Byakuya here, to this very train of thought: did he want to be feared?</p><p>The most obvious answer was no, but it was <i> why </i> he didn’t want to be feared that stood out to him.</p><p>
  <i> He was lonely. So fucking lonely. </i>
</p><p>He’d always known this, but he’d repressed it. He convinced himself he didn’t need friends. But as he grew older, he started to realize there was more to life than just business and following rules. Often Byakuya stared at his classmates as they interacted, or listened in to their conversations. Each time he could feel his chest tighten with envy. His classmates had so much <i> freedom </i>. They could do almost whatever they wanted so long as their parents allowed. They could go to the fair, pay for food that would inevitably make them sick, and pay ridiculous amounts of money for tickets to a game they’re bad at. They could go drive around for hours, listening to music and each other as they spoke. They could do whatever they pleased, and have little to no repercussion. Byakuya wished he had the same.</p><p>But he had something they didn’t: power. With power came money, and with money came power, so it was really an endless cycle- a cycle that Byakuya couldn’t escape. Sometimes it was overwhelming just how much power he’d have in the future- being part of the secret council that runs the world from the shadows. Was he really ready for that?</p><p>Judging by how much his father degraded him, he didn’t think so. His father seemed to have no problem going on and on about how he was pathetic, disappointing, humiliating, and other similar words and phrases. The words seeped into the cracks on Byakuya’s heart, rooting in like seeds and sprouting bouts of self-deprecation. </p><p>Of course this was something he never spoke of. He wouldn’t dare out his father like that even if he wanted to. And even if he did, who would believe him? Not the police- they could all be paid off. His classmates who <i>would</i> believe him were powerless. So, even if he wanted to, he had no one to turn to. It was impossible. Besides, he wouldn’t be caught dead being weak in front of someone. His father always said that even the tiniest bit of weakness was enough for extortion.</p><p>Byakuya carried the heavy words every day, and they’d eventually solidify in his head and harden into a cold, icy armour that protected and shielded him from harm. </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p>Byakuya always had a natural, sort of instinctual sense of righteousness. After all, he was the prestigious progeny set to inherit the Togami Conglomerate one day, and he’d earned that title fair and square. So, he knew he was far better than all his classmates. It was natural for him to be cocky.</p><p> However, after building and perfecting his exterior for years, he never thought it’d be broken.</p><p>He’d realized the crack in his armour after a certain encounter. He and Celestia had decided to meet after school to ‘bond’- which was their fancy way of saying hang out. Usually they’d start off with tea time, talk and gossip for at <i>least</i> an hour, and then they’d get to their activity. It usually consisted of some sort of gambling, whether it be cards or dice or whatever- Byakuya’s mansion easily had any kind of gambling available.</p><p>Celestia had come home with him, and after ordering a servant to get them some tea, they’d settled in the parlor. It was one of the smaller rooms in the Togami mansion, but still extravagant. The lace looking curtains framed the windows, which were a half hexagon shape. The small table fit neatly to the windows, custom made more than likely, and stretched a few feet out. There were other couches and areas to rest, of course, but they both preferred it here.</p><p>Celestia rested her elbows on the table, hands under her chin and smiling a bit. “So, Byakuya, did you do well on your history exam?” She asked. Her voice was light and sweet, the elegance of her accent enough to break Byakuya’s gaze out the window.</p><p>“It was alright. Nothing difficult, I suppose. And you?” He asked, turning to her.</p><p>Celestia offered a hum and a shrug. “I’m not sure. I cheated on most of it.” She smiled innocently, although her eyes were mischievous. </p><p>Byakuya chuckled with a roll of his eyes. “Of course you did.”</p><p>She nodded, leaning forward on the desk. “Alright. Enough chit-chat, I have an especially interesting piece of information for you today.” Celestia said, voice significantly quieter. “And I know you’ll be surprised this time.”</p><p>Byakuya quirked a brow, leaning back in his chair. “Oh really? And what might that be?”</p><p>Celestia chuckled lightly, glancing down at the teacup and saucer placed in front of her. “Merci beaucoup!” She said as the servant exited the parlor, picking up the cup as elegantly as she could. Her pinky was out, of course.</p><p>She took a sip of her tea, sighing softly. “Your servants always prepare the tea correctly.” Celestia said with a small smile, setting the cup down and using her pinky finger to cushion the sound. </p><p>Byakuya set down his tea cup after a few sips, humming. “Glad you think so,” He said softly, glancing up at her ruby colored eyes. He couldn’t help but be impatient- Celestia never said she had information that would surprise Byakuya. Usually it would make him disappointed more than anything.</p><p>“Now, about that information…”</p><p>Celestia giggled softly, smiling innocently at Byakuya. “Alright, alright. I suppose I’ve prolonged it long enough.” She said softly, resting her elbows on the table yet again. “You remember that Makoto boy, correct?”</p><p>Byakuya hummed, pretending to try and rummage through thoughts to remember the other, but he knew who he was immediately. Makoto Naegi, the Ultimate Lucky Student of class 78. Hardly an ultimate talent, if you asked him. His luck wasn’t as near apparent as that Komaeda kid’s luck. He was average, at best. They didn’t know each other well- they were acquaintances at most.</p><p>But fuck, he was also cute. He didn’t know how or why, but he was just pretty… those big green doe eyes of his seemed to entrance Byakuya, that slim and small body was one that Byakuya almost just wanted to protect, and that fucking smile of his was way too cute. </p><p>It never once crossed his mind that he might be crushing on the other- especially since he wasn’t exactly allowed to be gay anyway. Why would he be anyway? He never found women particularly attractive, and he didn’t think that men were either.He just thought Makoto was pleasing to the eye. </p><p>Byakuya lifted his teacup again, humming. “I do, yes. What about him?”</p><p>Celestia smiled up at him. “According to various sources, he has fallen quite hard for you.” </p><p>Byakuya paused, choking on his green tea. He coughed, taking the napkin that Celestia handed him to wipe his mouth. “I-I’m sorry… <i>what</i> did you say?”</p><p>Celestia giggled and took another sip of her tea. “I know you heard me, Byakuya. Do not pretend you didn’t.”</p><p>Byakuya coughed a few final times, staring into Celestia’s rose colored eyes. “You’re saying Makoto Naegi has a <i>crush</i> on <i>me</i>?”</p><p>She nodded and set down her cup again. “Mhm. I heard it from my dearest Kyoko, so you can trust that it’s true.”</p><p>“I see..” He said quietly. What was this? His face felt hot… and his heartbeat quickened in his chest. He never expected Makoto to be interested in him like that- he didn’t know he was even interested in boys! And besides- why Byakuya of all the boys in his class? He was mean to Makoto- the only mean one to him. Wouldn’t he have wanted a much nicer person to date?</p><p>“Your face is quite rouge, monsieur!” Celestia teased, in jest, a sly smile working its way onto her lips. “Is there any reason for that?”</p><p>Byakuya huffed. “Oh hush, Celeste. It just… surprised me. I didn’t expect Makoto to…”</p><p>“To swing that way?”</p><p>“Mhm.” </p><p>Celestia offered a shrug. “Well, what are you going to do about it?”</p><p>She knew what she was doing. She wanted a reaction from Byakuya- and she got one. He tensed a bit, narrowing his gaze. He was trying to read her- gauge what he should say. It was true that she was Byakuya’s friend, but he could never be too careful.</p><p>“Ignore it. What- do you think I have romantic feelings for the other?”</p><p>Celestia smirked. “Perhaps… why else would you fluster so easily, Byakuya? It’s as plain as day that you’re worked up about it in one way or another.”</p><p>Byakuya sighed, exasperated. “Celestia. You know that even if I ‘swung that way,’” Of course he used air-quotes, “I can’t indulge in that kind of relationship.”</p><p>Celestia nodded quietly. “I know- you aren’t allowed to marry or date. But… what if you did it in secret?” She smirked.</p><p>Byakuya raised a brow. “In secret? As in-”</p><p> </p><p>“Not telling your father. Exactly.” Celestia smiled. “It would be simple. You present Makoto as your friend- an assistant, even- and your father is none the wiser.”</p><p>Byakuya scoffed. “You think I have time for something as ridiculous as romance, Celeste? What if my father finds out anyway? He’d be furious.”</p><p>“Well, you do not have to. But you two would make a pleasant couple. I can picture it already.” She offered, using the rim of her finger bone ring to trace the patterns in the tea cup. “But, if you do not see it, there is no need to continue the conversation.”</p><p>“Good. Then let’s change the subject. Did you hear about Sayaka and Leon’s-”</p><p>-</p><p>“Hey! Good morning, Togami-kun!” </p><p>Byakuya could hear Makoto’s cordial voice from the doorway of the library. Why on earth was Makoto in the library? He’d only ever come with Kyoko to do some studying- and she wasn’t with him.</p><p>Byakuya looked up from his book, narrowing his gaze a bit. “Hello, Naegi…” He said quietly.</p><p>Makoto offered a smile- one that came off excited. Or perhaps that was Byakuya reading into it too much. He was good at deciphering people, after all. His eyes could dissect a person’s mood in a split second, something he’d been taught by his father. “I-I just came to the library to read. I- uh- also figured you were here, and thought you might like company!”</p><p>Byakuya hummed, looking back down at his book. “I don’t.” He said simply, curt and sharp as always. </p><p>Makoto seemed to falter for a moment, but was determined enough to sit next to the other. “Please? You always seem so lonely, Togami-kun.” He said, voice slightly whiny as he leaned over the desk. </p><p>“I’m not lonely, Naegi. And besides, I don’t need your pity.” Byakuya hissed. His iron-sharp tongue was practically stabbing into Makoto’s heart, almost crushing his determination. But Makoto was persistent, for better or worse.</p><p>“I promise I’ll be quiet?” Makoto suggested, voice a bit quiet and shy.</p><p>Byakuya raised a brow, looking up from his novel to meet Makoto’s gaze. The other’s face flushed as their eyes met, quickly moving his olive colored eyes away from Byakuya.</p><p>Immediately he was drawn back to his conversation with Celestia. Did Makoto actually have a crush on him- or was it a rumor? She said it came straight from Kyoko, and she was a very reputable source. Now thinking about it, with the way he was blushing and avoiding his gaze, he couldn’t say he was all that surprised. </p><p>Byakuya hummed for a moment, pretending to think things over. “Well… if you won’t disturb me, then fine. I’ll allow it.” </p><p>Makoto’s eyes lit up, starry and wide and dare he say childlike. Fuck. That was adorable. Byakuya could feel something in his chest, short lived but intense. It was pleasant, too, but it confused Byakuya. What was that?</p><p>He hid his reddening face with his book, watching as Makoto moved beside him. He got out a book of his own- it seemed like a fiction novel, but he couldn’t tell what genre it was. Instead of continuing to stare at the other, he tried to focus on his own book.</p><p>Key word: tried.</p><p>Makoto always seemed to be moving, doing some sort of other task. At first it was tapping his foot or pencil, which Byakuya could understand and bear. It was just tapping. Byakuya couldn’t say it wasn’t annoying, but it was fine. </p><p>What wasn’t fine was when Makoto began to sneak glances at Byakuya. At first he didn’t notice, simply too engrossed in his novel. He always found himself quickly absorbed in true crime novels, fictional or not. It was all interesting to him. But as the tapping ceased, he couldn’t help but glance up. </p><p>Immediately he was met with those olive colored eyes, which quickly darted away, trying (and failing) to pretend that he wasn’t looking at him. A bright rose color bloomed on Makoto’s cheeks, burning into his pale skin. Was he embarrassed? How cute, Byakuya thought.</p><p>Byakuya returned to his book, trying to assume where he’d left off. But… something was wrong. He felt like he was being watched.</p><p>He looked up again, seeing Makoto red faced and practically hiding his face in his book. Byakuya narrowed his eyes, but didn’t say anything. He had to be imagining things, right? There was no way Makoto was staring at him.</p><p>But even as he, <i>again</i>, tried to absorb himself in his novel, the feeling returned. The feeling of being stared at, or perhaps admired was a better word for the situation. His face began to burn at the implication. <i> Was Makoto actually admiring him? </i></p><p>It wasn’t anywhere near a preposterous idea. His mind was brought back to Celestia and his’ conversation again, thinking back to what she said.</p><p>
  <i>”Fallen quite hard.”</i>
</p><p>If it was true, Makoto was not hiding it well. Byakuya glanced up at him and saw the other staring again, and instead of breaking away his gaze and focusing back on his book, he returned the gaze. Makoto’s eyes widened again and he looked away, face cherry colored.</p><p>He felt Byakuya’s gaze linger, and his face flushed a darker red. “U-Uh…”</p><p>“What? Don’t like the taste of your own medicine?” Byakuya asked, folding his book shut. </p><p>Makoto bit his lip, refusing to meet his eyes. “I-I didn’t mean to stare, Byakuya! I just… I got distracted!”</p><p>“By what? I know I’m attractive but what about me could possibly cause you to stare?” Byakuya asked, folding his book shut. He stood from his chair, pushing it out as he rose to his feet. He rested his hands on the table and loomed over Makoto, causing the other to swallow thickly.</p><p>“I-I…” Makoto stammered, face red.</p><p>Byakuya leaned down, faces inches apart from each other. “Makoto.”</p><p>“Y-Yeah?” He asked quietly, finally moving his eyes to meet with Byakuya’s own blue ones. </p><p>Byakuya felt his chest tighten again. Fuck, there it was again. The same sort of feeling, a skip of a beat in his normal pulse. What was this? His face burned at the feeling- it was so unusual but not at all unpleasant. What <i>was</i> unpleasant, though, was the feeling of his warm face. He couldn’t believe that he’d been put in a state like this- especially in front of a pathetic commoner. </p><p>Byakuya immediately sat down, opening his book again. “J-Just don’t do it again, alright?”</p><p>He stuttered.</p><p>How could he let this happen?! Byakuya Togami was nothing if not composed, cool, and collected. And now Byakuya’s face was flamed with red and heat, causing him to raise his book in hopes of covering his face. </p><p>Another crack in his armour.</p><p>-</p><p>After this, and a few other small events with the boy, Byakuya had reached a conclusion: it was obvious Makoto had a crush on him. At first Byakuya didn’t know how to react to the fact- it made him feel uncomfortable. The only experience he’d had first hand was with Toko, and lord how he loathed that girl. Obsessive, stalker-ish, and crazy behavior was what he associated with having a crush on someone.</p><p>But with Makoto it was different. Makoto was… normal. Sure, he seemed a bit awkward around him at times, but other than that he was just plain, regular Makoto. Honestly, the realization of that was more of a relief to him- that Makoto treated him normally. It was just like they were friends, and nothing was weird between them.</p><p>So, it wasn’t. </p><p>Things carried on like normal. Byakuya spent a bit of time with Makoto each day, and each day they’d get a bit closer. They never moved too fast or did exhilarating activities, always choosing to go slow instead.</p><p>One of Byakuya’s personal favorites was when they’d go over to his house, they’d curl up in the library and read. His home library was gorgeous and grand, with tall walls that took up three floors of the home. Most of the wall was lined with bookshelves, and what wasn’t was covered in dark red wallpaper. The windows were tall, and covered in black velvet curtains. Some days if they felt like it, they’d curl up on the window seat and let the natural light source highlight their pages. Other days, if it got chilly, they’d curl up by the fireplace and use a desk lamp.</p><p>Above the fireplace mantle rested a few expensive items, mainly vintage or heirlooms: a golden gun, replica from an infamous serial killer, an old timey radio, more than likely broken, and a crystal skull, carved straight from pure rock crystal, and a golden airplane, a sculpture found in ruins centuries ago. Of course, when Makoto came over for the first time, he commented on how ‘one of these is probably worth more than my house’ followed by a soft chuckle, to which Byakuya nodded with a shrug. Of course Makoto had grown used to it, after coming over a few times, but sometimes he could catch Makoto ogling at them.</p><p>This time was not one of those times.</p><p>Today Byakuya had invited Makoto over, and like usual, they were intent to spend their first hour or so together. </p><p>“So, Makoto, where should we read today?” Byakuya asked, looking over at Makoto, who shrugged.</p><p>“Hmm… maybe the window seat? It’s kinda light out.” He said, shrugging off his blazer. “It’s only raining a bit, should still be light enough.”</p><p>“Alright. Draw back the curtains and I’ll get our books,” Byakuya commanded, smiling a bit as Makoto murmured a ‘yes sir’ in jest. He made his way over to the bookshelves, where in the middle lay a coffee table and a few chairs. He grabbed his and Makoto’s books, glancing to make sure the bookmarks were still secure. He was able to read the titles when Makoto drew the curtains open fully. </p><p>As he looked over, Byakuya had to pause. The light, even if a bit dim, illuminated Makoto. It cast a glow onto his messy bistre colored hair, and accentuated his olive-colored eyes. Byakuya was rendered speechless at the simple, yet charming site. His heart swelled in his chest, about to overflow from his mouth and spill out words when Makoto spoke up.</p><p>“U-Um… Byakuya?”</p><p>The words caught him off guard, and he closed his mouth. He didn’t even realize it was open- that was embarrassing. A red quickly spread across his cheeks.</p><p>“I apologize, Makoto… I seemed to have spaced out.” Byakuya said quietly, shaking his head. “Let’s get to our reading, alright?”</p><p>Makoto nodded. He didn’t seem to notice anything off with Byakuya, so he just silently made his way over to the window seat. He leaned his back against the glass, waiting for his friend to join him.</p><p>Byakuya took a seat next to him, letting his one leg cross over the other. He offered Makoto his book silently as the other curled up, knees to his chest. Byakuya wondered silently how on earth that was a good posture position, and knew that the other would eventually change into something more comfortable not even five minutes later.</p><p>Makoto did, of course, shifting over a bit to untuck his legs. He, too, crossed a leg over the other, mirroring Byakuya. The other glanced over, but didn’t say anything, before returning to his book.</p><p>Byakuya was, of course, reading a true crime novel. He loved everything about these kinds of novels- the minute, tiny details and the thrill of awaiting the killer or detective’s next move. Solving a murder case was like a game of chess, in Byakuya’s eyes. It was precise, sometimes slow, and always involved an unexpected move from the other party. That, in his eyes, is what made novels like this interesting.</p><p>Makoto, however, was reading a dystopian novel. Byakuya couldn’t say he understood why, since they didn’t pique his interest. Makoto could go on and on for hours about why he adored them- and, fuck, when he did his eyes lit up and sparkled adorably- but still he didn’t quite understand. Fiction for Byakuya was always unappealing, so naturally dystopian novels were a whole other field for him.</p><p>Glancing over at Makoto, he paused for another moment. For once, Makoto looked focused. He was chewing on his bottom lip, his eyes concentrated on the words. Byakuya felt his face heating up as he continued to stare, but couldn’t pull his eyes away.</p><p>He was… gorgeous.</p><p>Fuck. Was it gay to admire a boy the way he’d admire a woman? It wasn’t like he <i>loved</i> Makoto- no, he just… he found him pretty. There was nothing wrong with marveling at another boy’s handsome features. It wasn’t abnormal to want to trace the contours of his face, or cup his cheek and hold him close. And, it was totally normal to want to hug him close for hours on end. </p><p>Byakuya had to convince himself of all this as he pulled his eyes away from the other. He wasn’t attracted to Makoto. No. He was just admiring the other’s beauty. </p><p>He had to talk to Celestia about this.</p><p>Byakuya tried to focus again on his book, but for once, he was the one who couldn’t focus. It was like Makoto and he had switched spots. Makoto was focused so strictly on his book, and Byakuya couldn’t even comprehend a whole paragraph of his book. </p><p>This was unnatural. Why couldn’t he focus?</p><p>He just wanted to stare at Makoto’s pretty face…</p><p>The thought sent a chill down his spine. No. He did <i>not</i> want to admire Makoto- definitely not in the way Makoto wanted to admire him. He was just… he just liked how he looked! There was nothing wrong with finding him pretty! That was <i>fine</i>. Why couldn’t he just find it fine?!</p><p>Byakuya glanced over at Makoto- was he closer?- and stared at him for a moment. He looked peaceful, so… so pretty. The boy was a dreamboat and he didn’t even need to try. Byakuya’s face felt hot at the mere thought of him, let alone staring at him.</p><p>Why was his pulse so quick?</p><p>He wanted to curse the very existence of it. It felt so loud, like it was in his ears. Or worse, it was loud enough that Makoto had heard it. But he hadn’t, right? The other was still so fixated on his book, concentrating with a newfound consistency. The other hadn’t moved in what felt like hours, but it had only been a few minutes.</p><p>Byakuya finally tore his gaze away from Makoto, determined to make himself calm. He couldn’t stand to be seen with a red face anyway, especially not by some plebeian. He didn’t want to be caught in a state like that…</p><p>After a few minutes, Byakuya had finally made the decision of thinking about it later- perhaps he’d even ask Celestia for her opinion. With peace of mind, after what felt like <i>hours</i> of panicking, he finally felt himself relax. The heat was fleeting from his cheeks, and he felt his body relax back against the window again. </p><p>He snuck one last final glance at Makoto before returning his crystal blue eyes to the pages again. He didn’t seem to notice. Thank god.</p><p>Byakuya began to read again, trying to submerge himself in the world of true crime and cold-blood killing. As soon as he found mild success in that quest, he felt something touch his shoulder. Of course, lo and behold, it was Makoto.</p><p>He had his head on his fucking shoulder. Did he notice?- It seemed he didn’t, because he wasn’t moving away. Wouldn’t he have moved if he’d noticed?- Why was it so warm? His shoulder felt tingly, and warm- but not… unpleasant. It was warm in a comforting, almost… unfamiliar way.</p><p>He was visibly tense as Makoto kept his head there, continuing to read. There was that cursed shade of red returning to his face. There it was again!</p><p>This was going to be a long day.</p><p>-</p><p>After an hour, Makoto and Byakuya had decided to wrap up the reading. Makoto had teased the other for a slightly red face, Byakuya said he was just a bit toasty as an excuse. Not a lie, he supposed, so he didn’t mind saying it.</p><p>“Oh! Well why don’t we go to the pool and cool off? You said you have a pool- and I might have swimming trunks in my bag?” Makoto suggested as they walked, smiling a bit up at Byakuya. </p><p>Byakuya looked down at the other, raising a brow. “Why would you have swimming- I won’t even bother asking, actually. If you want to go to the pool, yes, that seems like an enjoyable activity.” </p><p>Makoto grinned. “Yeah! I’ll get my bag from your bedroom and change- then we’ll head down?”</p><p>“Mhm. Be quick, though, the walk is-” </p><p>“Byakuya.”</p><p>As he turned the corner he was met with a tall figure, one who was looming over Byakuya and Makoto. He had brown hair and blue eyes, almost identical to Byakuya’s own, but there was something else behind them. Something stormy, something angry… Byakuya couldn’t help but swallow thickly, admittedly afraid, even if it wasn’t visible on his face.</p><p>“Yes, father?” Byakuya asked quietly, refusing to meet his dad’s eyes.</p><p>“Who is this?” His father asked, crossing his arms.</p><p>“My friend- Makoto.” Byakuya said quietly.</p><p>Makoto offered a grin to the other, sticking his hand out to shake. “Yeah! It’s nice to meet you-”</p><p>“Don’t speak to me, plebeian.” His father snarled, causing the other to murmur a soft ‘oh, sorry’ as he put his hand away. “Byakuya, you didn’t get permission for this commoner to be here. Did you think you could get away with that? Having a classmate over while I’m away?”</p><p>Byakuya looked down, face red from embarrassment. “No, father.”</p><p>“Then why did you do it?”</p><p>“I-I don’t know.” </p><p>He took Byakuya roughly by the arm, leading him into a seperate room. To Makoto it probably just looked like he’d get a stern talking to, he thought, but it was so much worse. Byakuya’s heart hammered in his chest, this time in neuroticism. He knew what was to come.</p><p>His father didn’t bother closing the door all the way, but he knew Makoto wouldn’t peek. He knew better than to bark up the wrong tree, he hoped. As soon as he let go of Byakuya’s arm, he was met with a harsh slap to his cheek. Byakuya closed his eyes tightly at the impact, despite expecting it. He opened his eyes to look at his father directly, and rather than a look of fear or shock, he had on that same stone-cold look. If he didn’t, the punishment would be worse.</p><p>“You think that’s fucking acceptable? You think it’s acceptable to bring a <i>filthy fucking commoner</i> into <i>my</i> household?! Are you out of your fucking mind, Byakuya?!”</p><p>“N-No! I just-”</p><p>Another smack.</p><p>“Don’t stutter! How can I expect you to run a company when you can’t even use your words?!”</p><p>There it was. Byakuya’s father would always use the company to threaten or shame Byakuya, in some way or another. He knew how hard Byakuya had worked all his life to get to the position of heir, and he constantly used Byakuya’s occasional moments of weakness to try and distance him from the company. Distance him from what he was supposed to be. Distance him from all his work.</p><p>He grabbed the other by his blonde locks, yanking up. Byakuya was silent, staring into his father’s eyes with a blank face, but behind that mask was fear. He knew his father knew this, too.</p><p>“What do you think is a suitable punishment for this, Byakuya?” He asked, tone sharp and cutting into Byakuya’s mind.</p><p>“Whatever you see fit, Father…” He replied quietly.</p><p>“Hm. You have <i>some</i> sense, it seems.” His father said, letting go of his hair and watching as Byakuya sunk to the floor. He was mortified, and terrified. He knew his father could see through him… and that only intensified the feeling.</p><p>“No meals for three days- if you behave. If not I’ll lengthen it to one week.” His father said coldly. </p><p>Byakuya’s eyes widened. “Father, I’ll pass out-”</p><p>“Good. If you do, you do. I don’t care. It’s what you deserve if you try and disobey me.” </p><p>The door closed behind him. Byakuya stared at the floor, closing his eyes tightly. He sighed. He fucked up… didn’t he?</p><p>He stood from his spot, dusting off his pant legs. He gazed at his reflection in the window. His face was still red, mainly from the slaps, and partially from embarrassment. He had this fearful look in his eyes.</p><p>He felt small. Vulnerable. And he fucking hated it.</p><p>He took a moment to compose himself, make sure he looked fine, before stepping out of the room. He saw Makoto standing a good amount away from the door, on his phone. He was typing something, he couldn’t tell what of course.</p><p>“Apologies for the delay… my father was unaware you were coming over.” He said quietly, looking down at Makoto. His eyes met with Byakuya’s own, nodding.</p><p>“O-Oh! It’s alright, don’t worry about it…” He murmured, looking up at him. “Are you okay?”</p><p>“Of course I am. Now come on- you wanted to swim, didn’t you?” Byakuya asked.</p><p>Makoto nodded with a small smile. “Yeah! Let’s go!” He said happily, taking the other’s hand before pulling him upstairs. Byakuya followed, feeling his hands clam up slightly at the contact. His heartbeat was getting quicker again- and his face burned- he wasn’t sure if it was from the punishment or from the contact.</p><p>Once upstairs on the third floor, Byakuya was led into his own bedroom. It was large, of course, and themed around a dark peacock shade of blue. His bed was large, with white sheets and pillows, and a black comforter. He had a black desk with three monitors on it, putting even the most tech-advanced people’s (Chiaki and Chihiro) set ups to shame. On his walls he had a few paintings of castles and other landscapes, and one of a yellow rose. There was a double door that opened to his walk-in closet, and another single door that led to an ensuite. His room was enormous, simply put.</p><p>Makoto grabbed his bag from the floor, unzipping it. “Uh… yeah! I have swimming trunks in here!” He said eagerly, standing. </p><p>“Why?” Byakuya asked with a small smile, shaking his head. </p><p>“I dunno. Maybe it’s just my luck.” He said with a chuckle, standing and looking around. “Should I go to the bathroom to change?”</p><p>“Mhm. Feel free to head to the pool when you’re done, I’ll meet you there. I have a few small things to take care of.” Byakuya said, watching as Makoto nodded in response.</p><p>“Alright! I’ll see you there, then.” </p><p>-</p><p>Byakuya, after changing and fixing up a few things, headed downstairs to meet Makoto. He had ditched his glasses and in place had contacts- since it was much easier to swim without glasses. He had also donned a black zip-up hoodie for after, and had even grabbed Makoto one since he was so nice.</p><p>As he opened the door to their pool, he saw Makoto sat at the edge, dipping his feet in. He looked up at Byakuya, waving. “Hey!” He said happily, as Byakuya set Makoto’s hoodie down. “Whatcha got there?”</p><p>“What I have is a hoodie for you. I figured it’d be cold when you got out, and you didn’t bring one yourself. I was, as always, correct.” Byakuya said, unzipping his hoodie. </p><p>Makoto was staring, mouth ajar slightly as Byakuya removed his hoodie. Byakuya was tall, slim, and slightly muscular, unlike Makoto. The brunette was small, slim, and didn’t have a lot of muscle to him. Byakuya had a few scars on him, though, none of which looked fresh, but regardless Makoto didn’t seem to notice. He was too busy drooling over Byakuya’s toned body… the only reason Byakuya could tell was because he was red-faced.</p><p>“You like to stare, do you not?” Byakuya teased, watching as Makoto’s eyes widened and he blushed an even darker red. </p><p>“I-I’m so sorry, Byakuya! I just… I noticed the scars and stuff and I... yeah…” He murmured, looking away bashfully. “They just looked really painful…”</p><p>Byakuya gave a small shrug. “They’re nothing now.” He said simply, setting down his own sweater.</p><p>“How did you get them, though? It had to have meant something then..” Makoto said quietly, scooching towards Byakuya a bit. Byakuya just sighed.</p><p>“Makoto, even if I wanted to, for some reason, I can’t tell you about it. It’s forbidden.” He said quietly, glancing down into the water before meeting Makoto’s eyes again. “Alright?”</p><p>Makoto nodded quietly, looking away. “Okay… I’m sorry.” He said quietly.</p><p>“It’s alright.” Byakuya said, patting his shoulder once. “Just don’t ask of it again. Am I clear?”</p><p>“Crystal,” Makoto said quietly, chuckling quietly. He looked over to Byakuya and smiled. There it was- Byakuya’s heartbeat was picking up again. He offered a smile back to the boy, before the brunette stood.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Byakuya asked as the other backed up. He was given no verbal answer, just a cheeky grin, before Makoto began to run up to the edge of the pool, and at the last minute, jumped.</p><p>He canonballed into the water, splashing water all over Byakuya. “Hey!” He huffed, wiping at his eyes as Makoto resurfaced. The brunette was giggling, a melodious noise in Byakuya’s own opinion.</p><p>“Come in!” Makoto grinned, splashing the taller’s legs with water. “The water is great!”</p><p>Byakuya chuckled quietly, slipping into the water. “There. Happy, Makoto?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, I am, actually.” Makoto said happily, splashing the other again. “Come on! Are you seriously just gonna stand there and let me splash you?”</p><p>Ah, Makoto wanted a war. Well, if he wanted a war, a wonderful war would he get.</p><p>Byakuya began to splash the other in return, smiling a bit. The brunette squealed and splashed the other back, giggling. Byakuya hated to admit it but… this was fun. It was fun! He hadn’t had fun like this in ages....</p><p>A chip in his already damaged armour.</p><p>-</p><p>Byakuya was still caught on that day with Makoto. Specifically, his feelings. Of course, he wasn’t well versed in dealing with them, so his first, and only, stop was Celestia.</p><p>They’d spent the day at her mansion, sharing gossip and making fun of their classmates, as the rich do. As they settled into a game of blackjack in her library, Byakuya had begun to get the courage to speak of it.</p><p>“Celeste. You remember Makoto and his crush on me, correct?” Byakuya asked quietly, setting down his card. 16. He had to play carefully now.</p><p>“Mhm. I most certainly do. What about it?” She asked, setting down her own card.</p><p>Byakuya paused for a moment, looking at his card pile. Perhaps he could disguise this hesitation of telling her as hesitation for drawing a card.</p><p>Fuck it. Togami’s don’t hesitate. </p><p>He set down his card, smirking. “21 even, Celeste. You either bust or forfeit your turn,” He said, looking down as the girl smirked back.</p><p>She set down her card. “21 as well. Nice try, Byakuya.” She said happily, beginning to shuffle the cards. “Anyway… continue about Makoto,”</p><p>Byakuya chuckled a bit, shaking his head. Of course she tied with him- she was the Ultimate Gambler. “Well… I’ve been feeling notably strange around him lately.”</p><p>Celestia looked up, pausing her shuffling. “Strange how?”</p><p>Byakuya sighed, pushing up his glasses with his pointer finger. “Well… first, and foremost, warm. Specifically in my face.”</p><p>“Hm. Okay. What else?”</p><p>“My pulse quickens sometimes, seemingly for no reason other than being near the other. And when he touches me it… it feels so weird. It’s so tingly, almost sort of electric feeling at times, but… not bad.” Byakuya said quietly. “I don’t understand what it is…”</p><p>Celestia giggled.</p><p>Byakuya looked up, narrowing his eyes. “What about what I’m saying is humorous to you?”</p><p>Celestia looked up at him, a small and meager smile on her lips. “It sounds like the Togami Heir is in love.”</p><p>
  <i> In love? </i>
</p><p>Byakuya’s breath hitched, staring at Celeste. He couldn’t be in love. No. It wasn’t possible. It wasn’t fucking possible! He wasn’t <i>allowed</i> to be in love! </p><p>“I don’t want lies. I want honesty, Celeste…” Byakuya said quietly. </p><p>Celestia giggled again. “Byakuya, I am being truthful. You’re in love!”</p><p>Byakuya stared at her like she had three heads. He was… in love? The thought made Byakuya sick to his stomach. He didn’t know what love was supposed to be like… all he knew was that it was forbidden. </p><p>‘Love weakens you.’</p><p>That was one of his main reasons for not letting Byakuya marry, let alone date. Byakuya didn’t mind the rule, since he’d never had a crush or anything. But now… he wasn’t sure if he liked that rule anymore.</p><p>What was he saying? What’s wrong with him?! Love? Was he out of his mind? Love was for pathetic people who had pathetic lives, and too much time on their hands. Byakuya, of course, was far from pathetic and had virtually no time to spend freely.</p><p>So why was this happening to him? </p><p>Byakuya’s thoughts only continued to worsen, making his mind spin and making anxiety bubble up from within his stomach. He felt nauseous- and mortified. He just wanted the floor to open up beneath him and swallow him whole. And what if his father found out- if it was true? He’d be furious at Byakuya for being so weak- let alone falling for <i>another man!</i> He was going to be disinherited, surely. There’s no way his father would let him take over the company if he knew that-</p><p>“Byakuya.”</p><p>Byakuya looked up at the owner of the voice- Celestia. “Dear, you simply must calm down. It’s alright.”</p><p>“Celeste- you don’t understand. You and I-”</p><p>“-Come from two different worlds. Yes, I understand.”  Celestia said, sighing. “But I know one thing for certain, Byakuya. Love is not a choice. You need to relax and breathe, ami.”</p><p>Byakuya took a deep breath, as suggested. Immediately he was filled with a calming sensation, if only slightly effective. “But… I’m not allowed to pursue this kind of relationship… what is the point of even acknowledging these feelings if nothing can be done about it?”</p><p>“Well, Byakuya, there is something you can do about it.” Celestia said, taking a sip of tea. “You can, A, continue to ignore the feelings and keep your relationship with Makoto normal, B, cut off all contact with Makoto to get rid of the feelings, or, C, confess and be in a relationship with Makoto.”</p><p>Byakuya looked down. A relationship…</p><p>“What’s dating Kyoko like?”</p><p>Celestia raised a brow. “That was sudden… why do you ask?”</p><p>Byakuya narrowed his eyes. “Why do you think? I want to know.”</p><p>Celestia set down her teacup. “I shall satisfy your curiosity. What do you want to know about it, Byakuya?”</p><p>“What makes it different from normal relationships?” Byakuya asked quietly, causing Celestia to nod in understanding.</p><p>“Well… first, you can tell each other most anything, and there will be no judgement. It doesn’t matter if it’s humorous or serious- you can be as filter-free with them. At least, more than someone usually is.” Celestia began. “Then, of course, there is physical intimacy. Kissing and cuddling is a staple, of course. And you genuinely spend much more time with them- doing things like going on romantic outings and such.”</p><p>Byakuya nodded quietly. “What’s desirable about it, though? Why not just be very close friends?”</p><p>“Well… it’s nice to have a deeper level of intimacy.” Celestia said with a soft smile. “It is different. It’s… warm. Très charmant, if you will.”</p><p>“I still don’t see the appeal.” Byakuya said quietly, shaking his head.</p><p>Celestia hummed. “Well… perhaps you need some first-hand experience?” She suggested, a coy smirk slipping it’s way onto her lips.</p><p>Byakuya raised a brow. “What do you mean?”</p><p>She stood promptly, making her way to the back of her shelves. Byakuya watched with a keen eye, mildly interested and slightly terrified. Nothing about this could be good.</p><p>She returned with a book in hand. The cover was dark purple and red, with white cursive text on it. He couldn’t read it clearly, though. “This, Byakuya, is a novel. A romance novel.”</p><p>“Oh dear god.”</p><p>“I want you to read it.” Celestia grinned. “You’ll get a taste of what romance can be without actually having to experience it firsthand.”</p><p>Byakuya scoffed. “No way. I’m not reading a piece of trash.”</p><p>“Byakuya, you simply must! It’s one of the highest rated romance novels!” She insisted, pushing it towards him. He stared down at the white text, reading over the title.</p><p>
  <i> Forbidden Secrets </i>
</p><p>
  <i> By Toko Fukawa <i></i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya scoffed again, shoving the book away. “I refuse to read anything written by that stalker. Nice try,”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Celestia sighed. “Her work is simply brilliant, Byakuya. This very novel has received many awards.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I find that hard to believe. What could <i> Toko Fukawa </i> of all people know about romance? She clearly has no experience!” Byakuya huffed, shaking his head. Toko was nothing but a deranged stalker, and because of her crush on Byakuya, it warped her view. She was obsessed with him, and it annoyed him to no end. If he could make her forget he even existed, he would do so in a heartbeat.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Oh hush. It is a great read nonetheless.” Celestia said, pushing the book towards him. “Go on.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya sighed. “Fine.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>-</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya hated to admit it, but… the novel really seized his attention away from his other hobbies. Of course, it took a while for him to get intrigued. He found the descriptions of the characters bland and uninteresting, and that of crushing on someone overly dramatic. He was about to toss the book aside when things had finally gotten interesting. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The tension between the two main characters, described as <i>electric</i> which Byakuya found striking, was growing to a point where it had boiled over, and their lips met in a passionate, fervid kiss. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya didn’t want to admit he’d been hooked from there on out.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>To see their dynamic grow and change was so… interesting. And it was written so naturally. The characters Byakuya once saw as flat and lifeless were now brimming with emotion and personality. To see them shift their relationship from acquaintances to friends to lovers was… it was just so refreshing. He didn’t know why but he <i>adored it.</i></i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>His mind had filled with flashbacks of all those romantic scenarios that night, but instead of the characters in the book, he’d subconsciously replaced them with him and Makoto. At first he thought it was humiliating he was even having these thoughts. But as he continued, it just made his heart race with nothing but <i>want.</i></i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He wanted to hold Makoto on the rooftop under the stars, to cuddle him close to his chest in bed as the sun rose, and to kiss him beneath his garden’s gazebo. Fuck. He just… wanted that more than anything. The thoughts of those different scenarios kept Byakuya up that night.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>A fracture in his almost broken armour.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>-</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He was going to tell Makoto today.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya felt nervous. He’d invited Makoto over today with the intention of telling him tonight, and hoping for a good reaction. I mean- the other was rumoured to like him as well, so it shouldn’t go badly. Right? </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>I mean, it wasn’t confirmed that the other liked him like that. He only had Celestia’s word to go off of, and she wouldn’t lie to him. But there was every possibility she was wrong. Byakuya sighed quietly. He was too far into this for Makoto to not return his feelings. I mean- the whole reason he’d fallen in love with him in the first place was because he thought Makoto liked him! Perhaps he should’ve confirmed that fact…</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He felt so fucking stupid. He probably fell for someone who didn’t like him back.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>What was he talking about? He was Byakuya fucking Togami. He was the best person in Class 78. He was like a god compared to them! Someone would have to be insane to deny his love confession. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Regardless, he felt nervous. For once this was someone he actually <i>liked.</i> He wanted them to return his feelings more than anything. Maybe that’s why he was so worked up? Because for once he wanted to be loved back. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He still couldn’t believe he was thinking about love. Ugh. Was this right? Was this okay?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>What would his father think?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He pushed the thoughts into the back of his mind with a sigh, simply wanting to get the day over with. He’d be fine, he told himself, as he entered his walk-in closet. Most of it was suits, button ups, and other business style clothing. He did have a few more casual clothes, however, particularly in a more academia aesthetic. They were for more casual situations, with casual people. People like Makoto.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He slipped off his pajamas and set them in the hamper, glancing at himself in the mirror, before back at his wardrobe. He resented those scars on him. He covered himself in a white turtleneck, tucked it into his black jeans, and finished the look with a Gucci belt. He looked like a damn twink, didn’t he?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He put on his glasses and was able to clearly see himself, which made him pause for a moment. Was this even a good look? Or worse- did he look poor?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He quickly sent a picture to Celestia, asking if he ‘looked poor.’ Of course, she replied positively with a few sparkle emojis. Byakuya sighed quietly, setting his phone down before tying together the strings on his loafers. They were, of course, designer brand as well. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He took another look at himself in the mirror and took a deep breath. He had nothing to worry about. He was a Togami- which meant he didn’t just halfass things. No, he did things with confidence and elegance. He was going to sweep Makoto off his feet with his confession!</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He slipped on his watch- Rolex, of course. What do you take him for? A peasant?- and stared down at the time. He had a few hours before Makoto arrived, and he wasn’t hungry enough to eat Byakuya. He felt almost sick, but he chalked it up to nerves more than anything. Curse his stupid anxiety. He ran a hand through his golden locks, adjusting it afterwards. He looked fine… better than fine. He looked almost perfect.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya smoothed out his sweater and looked at himself in the mirror. The turtleneck was quite high, but not that it covered his whole neck. It covered what needed to be covered (in his opinion), and was still stylish. He sighed quietly, adjusting his glasses a bit before taking another look at himself.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Fixing a few strands of golden hair here and there, adjusting his clothes…</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Perfection.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He didn’t take another look at himself. He looked great- he knew. Besides, if he stared at himself anymore, he’d just pick at the flaws. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya grabbed his phone and left the room, glancing around his room. He took a seat at his desk, propping his phone up before searching through his recent messages. He pressed Celestia’s and pressed the video call button, waiting silently as it rang.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It took about three rings before Celestia finally picked up, a soft smile gracing her lips. “Bonjour, Byakuya!” She said softly, propping up her own phone. “How are you today?” She wore a simple black dress with red ribbon and lace accents, and her hair was down in place of her hair being in two drills. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Alright. A bit impatient feeling waiting for Makoto to come over, but I’m fine.” He said, adjusting his glasses once.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Ah- that is why you were asking for help with your outfit, correct?” She asked, earning a nod from the blonde. Celestia grinned. “Hm. So I assume you want to impress him?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>A tint of red spread across his face. “No-”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Liar.” Celestia smirked. “You’re telling him, aren’t you?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya paused. He knew he shouldn’t have been so surprised at Celestia reading him well, but it never ceased to confound him. He swallowed before nodding, looking down. “Mhm.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>A giggle emerged from the other side of the screen. “Wonderful news, Byakuya! You two will be an adorable couple.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>
      <i> Couple. </i>
    </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The words hit Byakuya straight in the heart. Makoto would want to be his boyfriend. Of course he’d considered it, but he hadn’t truly reviewed the option. He wasn’t allowed to have feelings- let alone pursue them!</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It was too late now, wasn’t it? He was so infatuated with the other. He knew he shouldn’t be, but… now he was. What was he to do- just let the feelings die after letting them blossom for so long? He’d rather not.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Besides… he wanted that kind of happiness. He craved warmth, so much more than he’d like. He was so touch starved and he longed for the simplest of touches more than anything… a brush of fingertips against each other, a pat on the shoulder, a simple hug would be nice, too…</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“What is that busy mind of yours thinking about now?” Celestia broke the silence with a bit of a smile, causing Byakuya to blush a tad. He spaced out again- god damnit. He’d done that a lot lately.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Nothing..” Byakuya muttered quietly, shaking his head. “I just zoned out is all. Nothing more.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Mhm. I’ll pretend as if you’re <i>not</i> in a gay panic.” She said smugly, causing Byakuya to look up with a glare. In response, she giggled. “Oh, Byakuya, I’m just kidding. Relax.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He huffed, shaking his head. “Oh hush. You know I don’t take too kindly to jokes.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>She hummed. “Mhm, perhaps I do. Perhaps I don’t care.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya scoffed, a small smile creeping its way onto his face. “Of course you don’t.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It didn’t take long for the two to laugh quietly amongst themselves. Byakuya felt comfortable around Celestia enough to genuinely, actually laugh. Celestia didn’t often vocalize it, but Byakuya knew she was grateful for that.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Ah… I miss you, ami. You need to come over soon!” She said. “I have plenty of <i> interesting </i> information regarding me and Kyoko. Besides, I’m quite interested in your little date with Naegi.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya practically choked on air, face red. “It isn’t a date?!” He huffed, and the other couldn’t help but laugh. “You are insufferable.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Et pourtant, tu m'aimes.” Celestia grinned, before looking over at her window. “Kyoko is here! I wish not to cut the conversation short, but I have a date. Au revoir!”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya smiled a bit. “Alright. Goodbye, Celeste. Keep me updated on what happens?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Of course!” She grinned, blowing two quick kisses to him through the camera. He chuckled as she ended the call. Celestia was always so dramatic- and yet he loved her anyway.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He glanced at the clock. Talking to Celestia always calmed him, but he still had a bit of time before Makoto was to arrive. He sighed. He’d work himself up again if he didn’t occupy himself with something. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>To the library it was.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>-</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya was in the middle of the Genocider Syo when the door to the library opened. He’d peeked his head out of the archive, listening to the servant speak. “Young master,” They’d said. “Mr. Naegi is here.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>His heart leaped into his chest. Was it that time already? Oh god.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Let him in.” He’d called back, turning so they couldn’t see his darkening face. He felt his heartbeat quicken again- but not in a good way. The other times it was a pleasant sensation- almost- but this was near unbearable. He felt hot, he felt his hands clam up and his chest tighten. He felt like was going to pass out-</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Byakuya?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He paused. <i> Makoto. </i></i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He took a deep breath, calling out an <i> ‘in here!’ </i> He took a quick look at himself through his phone camera, before nodding. Still perfect.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto entered the archive with a small smile, looking up at Byakuya. He… he looked <i> perfect. </i> He was just dressed in a simple outfit- a dark green sweater overtop a white button up, and plain blue jeans. But- he was just… so handsome. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Hello, Makoto.” He said, offering the brunette a smile. He was rewarded with a beaming smile in return.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Hey!” Makoto said happily, leaning forward on his tippy toes. “How are you?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya hummed a bit. “I’m well, thank you.” He said, setting down the file. “We should get out of here. There’s quite a few files you don’t need to look at-”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Confidential, huh?” Makoto asked with a chuckle. “Yeah, I get it. C’mon, where are we going?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Perhaps my room?” He suggested, to which Makoto nodded. “Perfect. Let’s go then.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He began to lead Makoto out of the archive, glancing down at him. He was quiet, with his eyes fixated on the floor. He looked like he was focused- like he was thinking of something important. Byakuya didn’t know what he was thinking about, but he looked some sort of upset…</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>What was he thinking about? As they continued to walk to his bedroom, he felt a sense of nervousness creeping up on him again. He could feel his heartbeat slowly getting louder, getting faster, only intensifying as he opened his door. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He wanted to tell him. It felt like a deep, dark, dirty secret that he’d been hiding for years- and he didn’t quite understand where the feeling came from, but all he knew was that it was most certainly unwelcome. Why was this even needing to be a secret anyway? Makoto liked him back- didn’t he? Maybe he didn’t. Maybe Byakuya had based his new forming feelings off a dumb little hypothesis and let it get to his head. This was all a mistake, wasn’t it? </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He shook his head once to free himself from his thoughts, taking a seat on the couch. He watched as Makoto set his bag down on the edge of it, before sitting down himself. He smiled a bit at the blonde before earning a smile back. His heart gave a particularly odd pulse at the mere sight of the brunette. This was sort of normal at this point, really, so Byakuya wasn’t surprised. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“So, Makoto, what should we do?” Byakuya asked, looking down at the other.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto hummed for a moment. “I dunno. I brought my laptop- we can watch some movies or something? Not sure if you’ll like any of them.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Hm. Alright. Do show me your options.” Byakuya said.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto grinned a bit and grabbed his bag, unzipping it quickly and rummaging through his things. Byakuya could spot a notebook, a hoodie, an empty water bottle, and a black laptop that he was pulling out. It looked… old.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto didn’t seem to care, though. He grabbed it and opened it, pressing the power button and waiting for it to boot up. Once it was on, he entered in his pin and watched as his desktop came into view fully. His background was set to the most recent group photo of Class 78, which made Byakuya smile a bit. He didn’t expect anything else from the other, honestly.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He watched as Makoto opened up his browser and signed into some streaming platform- Byakuya wasn’t quite familiar with what it was- and pulled up a few movies. “What about any of these?” He asked.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya glanced at them. All of them looked… they looked, well, unappealing, to say the least. “Hmm… these don’t look the best.” He murmured.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto nodded. “Here- these might be better.” Makoto said, typing into the search bar. A few different titles showed up, and immediately Byakuya was much more intrigued. They were all documentaries or docu-series, and typically themed around darker topics, like murderers. Byakuya was already caught by one.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It was a docu-series. It was about a hacker online, who discovered a video of someone tormenting cats, and trying to go after him. It had a blend of mystery, suspense, and humor. Of course it piqued Byakuya’s interest.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“This one?” Makoto asked quietly, to which Byakuya nodded. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Mhm. It looks interesting.” He said.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto nodded, clicking on it. Byakuya could immediately tell this would be good- with the cinematography style editing and the interesting storyline unfolding beneath him. Makoto seemed to be enjoying it too.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Wh-what are they doing to those two cats?” Makoto asked, absolutely horrified as he watched the scene unfolded. “Oh my gosh!-”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya, of course, was truly unphased. “Hm. It seems they’re-”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“No- no please. No commentary from you. I know.” Makoto murmured, leaning over slightly as he shook his head. “That’s awful… why would someone do that to a helpless animal?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I can think of many reasons they would. Most people that do things like this typically seek attention, and are willing to go to any lengths to get it.” Byakuya explained, looking down at the other. He looked genuinely upset, so much so that it made Byakuya feel almost a bit guilty.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“It’s just wrong…” Was all Makoto had to say, continuing to watch the screen. The other seemed phased, but he didn’t suggest to switch it off or anything, so Byakuya didn’t either.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>-</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Something was wrong.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto hadn’t spoken in a few minutes now- which was unusual for the other. Usually he would commentate on the show they were watching or speak about something unrelated, but he was dead silent. Byakuya wasn’t taking too kindly to the silence.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>On the final episode, he would’ve expected Makoto to be overflowing with excitement. But he didn’t look excited or in awe at all, just… focused. His eyebrows were knitted together slightly, staring down. He wasn’t even looking at the screen.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya was slightly concerned. The other was so… so concentrated- on what? He wasn’t concentrating on the show, was he thinking of something else?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The silence was deafening to Byakuya- he didn’t appreciate it one bit. The air was tense, for some reason. He assumed it was because of the lack of conversation. After all, as stated earlier, it was so abnormal for the others to not talk. Their hangouts usually involved lots of conversation, of everything and nothing at the same time. He… missed this. He wanted that same kind of easygoing, jovial kind of moments again. Not this… not this strained sort of atmosphere. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Makoto?” Byakuya asked quietly, deciding to break the tense silence. He couldn’t take another minute of this.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto seemed to be caught off guard if his reaction was anything to go by. He suddenly straightened his body a bit, eyes darting around to see who had spoken when he realized it was Byakuya. His face was slightly red at the realization.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Y-Yeah?” He asked, looking up at Byakuya. His tone of voice was… timid. Almost shy. So unlike the normal Makoto he’d come to know and love.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Are… you alright?” Byakuya asked quietly. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto paused for a moment, but quickly nodded. “Y-Yeah! Just thinking, is all.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya hummed once and raised a brow. “Oh?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto nodded again, blushing a bit. “Yeah, uh…” He murmured. “I just… yeah.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Something is clearly on your mind, Makoto. Do you want to tell me what it is?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya could only watch as the other bit his lip and looked away, face darkening in shade of red. The air seemed… tenser, now. Like a sort of calm before a storm. Byakuya wanted to rid the atmosphere of it so they could have fun. Because this- this tense, awkward conversation was anything but fun. Makoto might as well not even come over if he knew this was how it would go.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Um… I-I do.” Makoto said quietly. “But I’m… nervous.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya raised a brow. “Nervous?” He asked quietly. What could he be nervous about? Him and Makoto were good friends now, they’d had some questionable conversations already, but nothing that wouldn’t be strange for friends to have. He shouldn’t have a reason to be nervous. Besides, if it was something more serious, Byakuya was trusted by Makoto. Or did he not trust him?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The thought barely crossed his mind, but it made sense. Byakuya was cynical, mean, and he knew his place in the world. If Makoto came to him with his commoner problems, he probably wouldn’t understand and tease him. He was sure that was how Makoto saw it.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I just…” Makoto spoke up after a few moments, successfully breaking Byakuya from his thoughts. “I-I don’t want you to, like, think I’m weird or anything.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Weird? That word stood out to Byakuya. What was it that he was going to say? </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I won’t, Makoto. Just tell me.” Byakuya said, more of a demand than anything. His tone was harsher than he’d anticipated, and he could tell from the way the other looked up at him. Makoto’s eyes held worry in them, and it was more apparent than anything else about the other.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Okay…” Makoto said quietly, turning his body toward the other. “Just… promise me you won’t think I’m weird, okay? You gotta promise.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya raised a brow. What was so troubling that Byakuya had to make a /promise/? Regardless, he watched as Makoto put out his pinky finger, and murmured a ‘Fine, I promise.’ before linking their fingers together.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto stared down at the couch, eyebrows knitted together slightly. Byakuya was still deep within his mind, shooting different ideas of what he could be thinking. It had to be something that would affect how they perceived each other, right? After all, Makoto made such a fuss about it being ‘weird,’ so clearly he thought Byakuya would find it strange. Was he going to tell him an embarrassing secret?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Oh.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya realized. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Was he going to confess?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The thought sent Byakuya’s heart hammering, a feeling of uncertainty pooling in his stomach. He had expected to be the one to start the conversation about their feelings, but now that Makoto was doing it? Now felt almost too soon. Byakuya had only just figured out his feelings for the other! And he wasn’t even sure that Makoto liked him in the first place- he had been building these ‘reciprocated’ feelings off of baseless and flimsy claims. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya’s heartbeat was in his ears. He glanced away from Makoto to look down at his lap, where his hands were. They felt clammy. His mouth was running dry as the feeling of dread rose within him. If Byakuya had no self control, he’d be <i>begging</i> for Makoto to just get on with it and tell him and spare him the wait!</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya moved his gaze up back to the other and watched as he fidgeted. He seemed almost as nervous as Byakuya was, if the purpley-red sort of hue on his face was anything to go by. His hands were even shaking a bit. Just say it already!</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Makoto…” Byakuya said suddenly, causing the other to look up. Those big green eyes held much more fear and dread in them than they had before. Byakuya almost felt guilty for scaring the other. “Just say it.” He said quietly, tone more encouraging than fear-inducing. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto sighed, shutting his eyes tightly. “Okay.” He said quietly, nodding once. He paused for a moment, before taking a deep breath. He would finally say it- what had been on his mind for the entire time he’d been here. Byakuya was, for once, afraid of the words that would eventually be spoken. And waiting for so long was making his anxiety worse! God damnit- why couldn’t Makoto just say it?! Just rip it off like a bandaid and say it before Byakuya said it himself!</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Byakuya… I-I know we aren’t the best of friends.” Makoto began. Oh god- here it goes. Byakuya would have his questions answered in just a few moments. “And… I-I don’t expect you to feel the same way…” </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Oh my god. He had a crush on him, didn’t he? He was going to tell him that he, Makoto Naegi, a pathetic commoner, was in love with Byakuya, one of the richest boys in the world! Oh my god- Byakuya’s heart rate was so much faster at the realization.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I… I really like you, Byakuya! I like you so much! More than a friend should!” Makoto stammered, eyes closed tightly still. He pulled his hoodie strings tight, hiding his red face behind the fabric. “And I-I don’t wanna ruin our friendship with this! If-If you don’t like me that’s fine- b-but please, I-I don’t wanna stop being friends!”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya could only drink in the words as Makoto went silent, a small smile spreading across his face. Oh my god. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>
      <i> I really like you, Byakuya! </i>
    </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The words replayed in his head over and over. He felt like this was a dream- like this wasn’t real. He almost pinched himself.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Oh Makoto…” Byakuya said quietly, gently grabbing the hood and pulling it away from his face. “Look at me.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto knew that when Byakuya said something like that, it wasn’t a suggestion: it was an order. Byakuya knew he knew this, so it didn’t surprise him when he looked up after a few moments. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto’s fear-filled eyes widened in shock. “You… You’re smiling?” He asked, his voice timid and small, reflecting how timid and small Makoto felt. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“What, isn’t that a suitable reaction to being told you’re somebody’s crush?” Byakuya asked with a teasing tone. Now that he was sure he and Makoto were on the same page, he felt much more cocky. He could be confident now, without the fear of rejection.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“W-Well- yeah! B-But…” Makoto stammered, looking away from Byakuya. “I-I didn’t expect you to… smile, I guess.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“I’m sure you didn’t expect the feelings to be reciprocated, too, correct?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>
      <i> Smooth. </i>
    </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Immediately Byakuya noticed a change. Makoto’s olive green eyes were wide and starry, filled with wonder and hope as they stared into Byakuya’s own cerulean ones. His mouth fell open a bit, just stuck in awe and in shock. “Y-Y-You…”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya chuckled quietly, a dim feeling of heat rising in his face. “Mhm. I… I like you as well, Makoto.” He said softly, glancing down for a moment before back at Makoto. “In the same way.”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya could swear he saw tears start to prick the luckster’s eyes, but he couldn’t truly tell. He wasn’t able to stare for much longer before he was hugged tightly. Immediately his heart leapt into his chest. Oh my god- a hug. A hug! He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been hugged properly. It was so… so warm. So electric, almost. Byakuya didn’t know how to react. Of course, yes, it felt amazing. But it was so… new. It didn’t mean it was bad- quite the opposite- but it was confusing. Was this normal? Was this how it was supposed to feel when someone hugged you? Byakuya had a million questions running through his mind.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Makoto pulled back after a few moments, worry in his gaze. “I’m so sorry! I-I should’ve asked first, shouldn’t I have?” He asked nervously. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“It’s… alright.” Byakuya said quietly. His confidence had been stripped from him, leaving him feeling bare and exposed. “Would you mind doing that again?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Giving you a hug?” Makoto asked.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya nodded in confirmation, and soon felt a pair of arms wrap around him. He let out a soft sigh, slowly wrapping his arms around the other in response. It was so toasty, and he felt so snug in Makoto’s grasp. It was perfect. But… Byakuya knew one thing that could make it better.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Makoto?” He asked quietly.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He looked up from his original resting place, raising a brow. “Yeah?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya felt his palms begin to clam up. Now was not the time to get nervous- he had to be confident and quick. So, he forced out the words, “May I kiss you?”</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>He’d never seen Makoto so red- even the tips of his ears turned a flushed color. He was met with an immediate nod, and the other leaning his face forward slightly. “I don’t know how to do this…” Makoto admitted quietly, followed by a quiet chuckle.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It was only then Byakuya realized he didn’t know what to do either. Sure, he’d read it in scenes in his books and seen little bits in the small amount of media he <i> did </i> consume, but doing it in real life? That felt like such a daunting task.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Me neither…” Byakuya said quietly, face burning red at the admission. But it brought a smile to Makoto’s face.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>“Really? Okay- that makes things less scary, I guess.” Makoto said with a soft smile, shifting himself so he was eye level. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya felt adrenaline coursing through his veins. This wasn’t even supposed to be something so big, but of course to Byakuya it was. He was going to have his first kiss- and it was going to be with a boy. What if someone found out? What would they think? They wouldn’t tell- would they?</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>Byakuya didn’t have much more time to think, as he was met with a feeling of warm lips against his own. Immediately his breath hitched, basking in the moment as Makoto gently kissed him. He slowly began to kiss back, trying to copy the other’s movements. </i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>It felt like he was floating. Their time and space just seemed irrelevant, all he could focus on was the kiss. Byakuya felt warm all over, felt so… so happy. So safe.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>The kiss only lasted about twenty seconds, and that was when Makoto broke it off. He offered a shy, but overjoyed smile to the other, who returned it in a much softer way.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>There were going to be obstacles ahead of them if they pursued this- and this was a fact both of the boys knew. But right now, simply holding each other in an embrace, nothing else seemed to matter.</i>
  </i>
</p><p>
  <i>
    <i>With a feeling of safety, Byakuya, for the first time ever, let his armor fall to the ground.</i>
  </i>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>what a ride<br/>this is my magnum opus so far SUIHSGFS. critiques and comments are heavily appreciated- especially as someone who isn't very experienced in this fandom! (i've been in since probably nov. of 2020)<br/>have a good day y'all and drink some water &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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